Taken from Fritz Spiegl's Book of Musical Blunders and other Musical Curiosities.

The Conductor's Ear

Sir Thomas Beecham at rehearsal: Second trumpet - you're too loud.
Leader, embarrassed: I'm sorry, Sir Thomas, bit the second trumpet phoned to say he would be a little late.
Beecham, totally unembarrassed: Well. when he arrives, tell him he's too loud.
This much-related story is in keeping with Beecham's quick wit and gently barbed repartee.
For what conductors hear and claim to hear are often two different things. One maestro, keen to show off the acuity of his ear got hold of a double-bass part before rehearsal and altered one note. Then, at a rehearsal, he stopped the orchestra: "Fourth double-bass, you played an F sharp." The player said, "No, some bloody fool pencilled in an F sharp. I played an F natural as printed."


The Piano Poses as Furniture

Pianos fitted with Mr. Price's Patent Piano Warmer of 1869. Gives us an idea of how cold English houses must have been during winter time.

These Instruments invite playing in Winter when the coldness of the keys of all others makes it unnecessarily uncomfortable, if not painful, to many, especially children. They encourage practice, and facilitate execution, by a gentle warmth, rising from two small hot-water cylinders, of only the diameter of a wine-glass, hidden under their ends, easily handled, and giving a temperature never above blood-heat, and averaging summer heat for three hours. Comfort and perfect suppleness of hands are thus ensured; practice becomes inviting; pupils willing; the master's time economized; progress uninterrupted; general playing agreeable; and the Piano an article of unmixed pleasure; and most useful, when, in winter, from the absence of outdoor amusements, it is most wanted, but is now most avoided ......